NOTES FROM HOLLYWOOD: PART 7

Reflections on the Journey to Make a Feature Film

That’s a wrap.

​I was thrilled to say those time-honored words on Saturday afternoon in a parking lot in the neighborhood of Valley Village after we completed our last shot of principle photography for the film. We were filming a simple action: Slinger walking to his truck after buying ammunition at a gun store. A moment from the second act of the film, but the final piece of the scheduled shoot. Our massive deconstructed puzzle was now in the can. What a relief to reach completion. Josh was elated (as you can see below). I felt an enormous weight lift off my shoulders.
 
The crew was giddy all day. The final week of filming had been intense. Exhaustion permeated the set. We’d been working 12 hour days for over three weeks and everyone was fried. I felt it Monday when we were halfway through our day. A kind of sluggishness filled the air. And a foreboding feeling was creeping in around the edges: more rain was expected and our hardest week lay before us.
 
Tuesday morning before our first shot of the day I asked for all crew to gather in the small house where we were filming. I thanked everyone for their hard work and I acknowledged that we were all dragging ass after weeks of waking at dawn and getting to set by 7AM for 12 hour days. I told them that while I too was exhausted, I still felt lucky to be making a movie and that I still believed what I told them our first day together: that everyone on set matters to the success of the film, and that everyone’s intention shows up in what we capture on camera. So let’s stay in it, let’s keep our focus, and we’ll finish strong this week. I was trying to offer a boost of inspiration.

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I’m not sure it helped. The week was rough. I felt the pressure of time slipping through my fingers, with each day more ambitious than the next. Our canceled rain day at the beginning of the shoot came back to haunt us. To account for that loss, a day’s worth of work had been unrealistically redistributed to this final week and there just wasn’t enough time to get our coverage. We held a special meeting over the weekend and decided to add a sixth day to the final week, with a scaled-back crew. So with a Saturday call, we would get the 20 days we had originally scheduled. Hana said one of her pet peeves in production was the saying “let’s just go for it”. Yes, this was a noble fighting spirit, but it’s also naive and usually ends badly. She knows. Camera and lighting setups take the time that they take. And the average number of setups we were making each day (21 the final week) was not going to miraculously change just because we willed it to be so. We needed every minute of our 20 days.
 
We pushed through the week, and by Friday we had to go into overtime to cover one of the most tender scenes in the film in which two of the main characters talk about suicide. It’s a very important scene to me and I wrote it in memory of my sister, Rachel. I didn’t want to be sitting there on the second to last day of filming, and into overtime, rain coming down outside, with a worn-out crew, and Josh fraying at the edges, as we filmed this very emotional scene. But as we said time and again, this is the film that we're making. I had to dig deep and embrace the moment. Hana was reassuring. She knew this scene was important to me. Josh knew it too, which is why he stayed in it, take after take. Everyone knew it was important to the film. The focus and support in the room was palpable and I believe we got some beautiful performances. But it took everything I had in me to captain the ship that night.

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By the time we got to the last day, I was relieved to arrive at set and find everyone cheery and light and enjoying themselves. I worried that the sixth day would be weighty. That the overtime the night before might make people feel resentful. But we had made it to the finish line and the feeling of accomplishment and relief was palpable. (Our casting team, Meg and Sunny, joined us on set the final week. Above, chatting with Dylan). Josh was making jokes about the demand for more 1/8 page scenes. (The script is divided into 1/8 pages for scheduling. And an 1/8 page scene tends to be no dialogue. Looking out the window; waking up in bed; walking down the hallway. Those kinds of shots still each need their own set up, so they take time. And when filmed out of the story's sequential order, and stacked on top of one another throughout a day, they can make an actor a little crazy. Josh was game every damn day. And making light of this last day and more 1/8 page scenes was fabulous).

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And in a testament to the trust and creative collaboration that we developed over the course of production, Hana and I were still revising our shot list, and Josh and I were still interrogating the truth of the beats we were about to film up until the very last shot. We made a fairly significant change to a pivotal moment in the film right at the very end of the final day, when Josh questioned whether a moment I had written was earned. He was right to question it. Something didn’t feel right. And we made an adjustment to the story, and thus to the shot, that felt much stronger and more true to where Slinger is emotionally at that moment.

I felt the same trust working with Joanne Kelly, who brought Athena to life, and who helped me and Josh shift another pivotal story moment during the final week, as we climbed in together and made changes to a scene right before filming that landed much more honestly than what I had written.

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Last day giddiness aside, we all worked hard and stayed deep in the work, pushing each other to be sure we were being truthful to the very end of production. I don’t think I could have imagined more egoless collaborative partnerships than the ones I developed with both Hana and with Josh. These are two artists committed to excellence and honesty in filmmaking and I believe we created a rapport with one another, day after day, during the course of filming that allowed us to bring our whole selves to the work. We tested the durability of each other’s ideas with great respect for one another and we each showed a willingness to stay flexible in the moment. Sometimes we fought for a position. Sometimes we let go and allowed another position to take hold. It was never personal. It was always about the truth of the story moment.
 
Let me tell you, while this is my first feature as a director, I can say with certainty that the subtlety of these creative relationships and how they play out in the moment of filming, on the day, as they say, are the most important dynamic in filmmaking because this is where the goods are captured on camera forever. If you can trust your collaborators when you are deep inside the caldron of creative fire, after all the fundraising; after all the drafts of the screenplay; after all the hiring and casting and union contracts and negotiations and scheduling and shot-listing and location scouting; after the second AD has managed the entire company’s paperwork and all the gear has been rented and the trucks have been loaded and unloaded; after the dolly track has been laid and all the lights have been set up and taken down and moved again; after the camera has been set on the tripod, lensed and re-lensed; after all the scenic design has been arranged and tweaked and the props have been procured and vetted and laid on set; after video village has been set up with monitors for the producer and script supervisor and gaffer; after the costumes have been fitted and refitted and the makeup has been tested; after the caterer has shown up early to get the hot lunch ready on time with tables and chairs and tents for the whole crew and craft services has made the umptieth pot of hot coffee; after the PA’s have locked down the outer perimeter and the second second AD has brought the actors to set and the rest of the crew has locked down the inner-sanctum where we are about to roll camera; and after the production sound man says “sound speed” and the first AC says “camera speed” and the DP says, “set” and before the director says “action”, after all that preparation and consideration, if you don’t have the trust and spirit of true collaboration, the kind that we had inside that creative caldron, where you can be honest and work from the heart as you try to capture a slice of humanity forever, then you may as well go home. This is high stakes art-making, without question, and it takes too many resources and too many people to get to that precious moment to then waste it on bullshit. 

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(It takes everyone on the left, plus more, to make the shot on the right happen)

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that I know with certainty that we’re making a brilliant work of art. Who knows at this point how it will all end up? What I am saying is that when we got into the room, we did our best, shot by shot, to push each other to be honest. To tell each moment of the story as truthfully as we could. And that we stayed open to the reality that what we thought in the morning would be the right way to approach a moment might change a little or a lot by the time camera was about roll. We put ourselves in each other's hands in that moment. THAT is filmmaking. It's a humbling process and one that I will remain in awe of for the rest of my days. 
 
So, what’s next?

Uh...rest. I’m going to take the week off. I'm in debt on sleep. Meanwhile my editor, Libya El-Amin, who has been working diligently during production to assemble scenes, will be taking a few weeks to put together the first assembly of the whole film. We’ll start working closely together in about three weeks on the edit. They say when you make a film, you make three films: the one you write, the one you shoot and the one you edit. It’s the third one that everyone sees. I can't wait. (Okay, I can wait, just a little to restore my batteries). 

I’m grateful to the entire cast who showed up each day and lifted American Solitaire off the page and brought it life. Your work inspires me. Thank you. (Jamir Vega, Joanne Kelly, Hudson Brooks, and Josh Close, above).

And I’m feeling particularly grateful to the hard-working crew that assembled for the adventure of production. Thank you to our producer Dylan and line producer Liam, to the production office team, camera, grip and electrics, AD team, production design, costume, makeup, scripty, catering and crafty, set photographer, all the way to our PA’s Brian and Kevin who showed up early every morning, and even our overnight security guard. Your spirit and dedication made it happen. Thank you.

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If you’ve been following along these weeks as I’ve shared this journey, thanks for joining us. I’ll continue to share the narrative of this process as we move into post-production. So stay-tuned for the next installment. If I've learned anything so far, I’m sure there are more surprises to come...
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